panicked

i wanted to be loved all the way, the way a little girl imagines fairy tale style love happening. and i really wanted to love all the way, with my whole body wrapping you like the cellophane around your smokes…. but every time you came close, or i looked for the next one to let in, i panicked and froze and found myself so tangled in my thoughts all i could imagine was a life forever buried and hidden in dried out dirt. all i was becoming was a tangled mess of too many roots overwhelming a little tiny flower pot, and i forgot all about love at all. i waited to be watered, to be pulled out and laid on a table lined with new containers, waited for someone to have the time and patience to carefully untangle each beautiful root, and find the perfect pot to put me in so that love may finally bloom

©2017 erin hoffman – all rights reserved